Feelin' it

Warning: Controversial

Katy has always been a very sensitive child. As a baby, she had no interest at all in baby television, which is mostly abstract images and music. When she reached toddlerhood, she would get very upset whenever she watched many of the kids films and programmes. There is a lot of sadness, meanness, scariness, violence and death in stories like Snow White, The Little Mermaid, and even Strawberry Shortcake (the Pie Man upset Katy very much), Madagascar (Katy got upset by the concept of being marooned and lost at sea), The Lion King, or Toy Story. That's why she has loved Kai-Lan so much.

However, over the last few weeks, Katy has been actually asking to see scary things. She is wanting to face her fears and it seems like she is wanting to experience and process more challenging emotions. Part of it has been asking a lot and talking a lot about death (following the death of Kung Tai) and part of it has been asking about witches and monsters and where they go, why they are mean and where they live.

She's also really getting into fairies and loves dressing up as Tinkerbell.

So I got hold of Tinker Bell and the Great Fairy Rescue. I really thought it would be free of any sad, scary or nasty bits. Lesson number one for Mama - watch everything first before showing Katy. Anyways, we sat to watch it together while Mama worked on the computer.

Everything was delightful. The whole magical fairy world of Pixie Hollow just thrilled Katy.

But then Tinker Bell got stuck. Katy tensed a little.
Then the fat cat (and Katy loves cats) leaps up and chases Tinker Bell. This relatively innocuous, and it is meant to be funny in the movie, event completely terrified Katy to the point of trembling. I was aghast.





So we stopped the movie and we talked about it and how Tinker Bell was ok and the cat didn't know what he was doing etc etc etc. And we watched it again to see what happened and check that Tinker Bell is ok at the end. And again. After three times of watching it and discussing what we saw, she could watch it without becoming distraught. She was processing her fears.

The photos above show her expressions during the third show, when I was asking her to show how she felt the first time she watched it. So they are already much diluted and the original was actually quite distressing for me. But we made it through and I actually think the whole exercise was really great in helping Katy to deal with negative emotions.

So I thought that was that and we watched happily and with great delight as Tinker Bell made friends with little Lizzie.
But then it was time for Tinker Bell to say goodbye. Even I got a little teary, although that is not saying much as I get teary when Lassie comes home. But Katy got very very sad. But it was a happy sad in that she was sad because they were such good friends.


And...lo and behold, Tinker Bell came back!
That made Katy really happy. Especially when Tink taught Lizzie how to fly.


And Lizzie taught Tinker Bell how to have an afternoon tea picnic.

I am in the final analysis really glad we went through the whole thing. I really believe it is helping Katy to deal with emotions. She is definitely a very passionate and spirited child. She always has been. And quite opinionated too.

We are working on communicating instead of stomping around fuming or having tantrums.